Are you from the LGBTQ+ community and feel pressured into a heterosexual marriage? Here’s how you can seek help.

If you haven’t come out to your parents or family yet about your sexual orientation, it can be challenging for you to avoid the topic of heterosexual marriage?

How do you tell your parents that you’re not into heterosexual marriage but rather prefer something nonbinary and non-conforming?


Do you even have to tell your parents that or is there another way around it?

How do you seek help if you’re feeling forced into a marriage?

1. Seek therapy – There is always a benefit to having someone hear you out. After you feel heard, you can easily connect with more people and feel less isolated. Therapy is deeply helpful. It might not stop the pressure from your parents but it will certainly help to release it. Talking honestly about your feelings is empowering and helps you to understand your own identity more firmly. 

2. Work towards becoming financially independent – This will help you tremendously in every area of your life. Financial independence is the key to other forms of independence in life. Once you are financially independent, you will be able to stand up to your parents more easily and be more honest with them about your life and preferences. Even if they threaten to cut you off financially, as many parents do when children come out, it will not affect you since you are financially independent.


3. Build a support system of friends you can be honest with – When a family fails you, you need a support system of friends who you can be honest with and turn to when you need them. A friend in need is a friend indeed. It’s best if you can ask your friends to help you just by being there and listening to you. Moreover, friends can also offer you space in case things get too bad with your family and you feel forced into a heterosexual marriage.


4. Do the hard thing and educate your parents – Most parents don’t support LGBTQ+ children because they are not aware of their sexual orientation or feel uncomfortable. The worst part is when they feel like it’s unnatural to be LGBTQ+. Educating them is a good option. You could even introduce them to your therapist or a local trusted family doctor who can educate them about how LGBTQ+ is a completely normal sexual orientation. It does not have to go be someone you directly associate with, it can be someone who your parents trust deeply.

Talking to people around, reading the newspaper, and staying updated about more strategies to overcome parental pressure will also help you. No single resource will contain all the information or material you need. You must seek empowerment within and find the courage to stand up for your own truth. If you are from the LGBTQ+ community, your choice to get into a heterosexual marriage without resonating with it will impact your future partner as well.

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