We all have our romantic notions of relationship and marriages, but there is this one common thread that binds them all. Everyone from your Bhatinda waali maasi to those massive hoardings around your city, peddling everything from diamonds to artisanal mithai, tells you that marriages are made in heaven. This belief that our relationship is created by nothing less than divine intervention is a visceral one. We are thus conditioned over time to believe that for each of us, there is this one perfect person, designed by God himself, who is sitting around, waiting and all we have to do is find them to have our happily ever after. But how do we find them?
We start listing down what they would or, in worse cases, should be like. We end up drawing up a person, like a 3D printer would, from their physical attributes – how tall should they be, how well built down to their habits, aspirations and goals.
We create our own version of the glass slipper and set out into the world to find our Cinderella.
And that’s where ALL the trouble begins.
Whenever we come across someone wonderful, we try and see if the slipper fits. If it doesn’t, we simply move forward.
He could be the most kind-hearted, fun-loving and compassionate person but, he’s a smoker. Oh no, Not for me.
She might be the most passionate, adventurous and witty woman you have met, but what dowdy clothes she wears! Oh no, not for me!
They say that one looks to meet their conscious and subconscious needs in their partner that could be psychological, emotional or physical. How does one’s level of fitness or city of residence contribute to fulfilling any of those needs? Why reject someone based on things which might not even be the same in a few years.
If it were all down to checklists those, who married the smartest or the most beautiful or the richest should be the happiest in the world, but everyone from Bill Gates to Hrithik Roshan is getting a divorce. Of course, some things are non-negotiable. They might be, taking care of your family, your career or when and how many children you want. But the standard list of the desired age difference, height, weight, caste, creed etc., don’t matter in the long run. So chuck the checklist and focus on the bigger picture!
A person is a lot more than just a sum of their attributes.
When you meet people, do so with an open mind. It doesn’t matter if you meet them through your friends, at a bar or through a curated matchmaking service. Focus on how they make you feel. Do they listen to you and laugh at your silly jokes? Do you feel special when you are around them? Is there chemistry?
The rest simply fades into oblivion.
MatchMe is a personalized matchmaking service that provides curated matches, from around the world, for individuals looking to enter holy matrimony. What sets it apart is the organic and progressive approach of Mishi and Tania, who have helmed this enterprise since 2015.