It’s safe to say that you are reading this if you have had a million conversations with yourself and have finally concluded, much to the utter dismay of your inner Peter Pan, that you are ready for a long-term relationship. Well, you need to pat yourself on the back as that’s a huge step in adulting and takes a lot of courage to take. Now that you know you want to find the one, you are left with that tiny task of actually finding them. We can help keep some basics in mind so, you don’t run around in circles and don’t miss out on some fabulous people –
1) Put yourself out there – To find the one, you have to get up from your couch, wear nice clothes, step out of the house, and meet people! There are so many hopefuls we meet who just don’t want to put in the effort of meeting people and want to wish their soulmate into their lives. Unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way.
2 ) Be Open – People meet their soulmates in the most unexpected circumstances so be open to meeting people through various avenues. It is not necessary that you would meet them only at a bar or through friends. Be flexible with your approach and meet people through family, dating websites or a matchmaker!
3) Know your non-negotiables – Spend time knowing what is important to you. A 3 year age gap and their height don’t count. Think about your life goals, your priorities and try and understand whether they match when you get to know someone new.
4) Be Honest – The urge to impress someone is natural, but to portray someone you are not is a dangerous impulse. To keep up the sham will be exhausting for you and unfair to the other, so, as cliche as it may sound – be yourself.
5) Chuck the Checklist – It is great to know the qualities you would want in a partner, but what seems super important now might not 10 years down the line so, if you think you have a good connection with someone, don’t reject them for an imaginary list.
6) Don’t Ignore the Red Flags – Someone way above your league might be interested in you or, you might find someone who is perfect on paper, but you have to look beyond that. Do you feel comfortable around them, do they make you laugh, are they kind and most importantly- are they ready for a long term commitment are some of the things you should ask yourself. What do endless days and nights with them look like? Are they filled with humorous banter or comfortable silences? If neither, then you have a lot to think about!
7) Prepare yourself for rejection – If you are not what they want, that’s ok! Heartbreak is heartbreak, and we understand that. Give yourself time to heal and move on ‘coz the more time you spend being hung up on the one that got away, the lesser time you get to have with your person! 🙂
8) Don’t be afraid to disagree – Arguments are a natural part of any relationship, so don’t feel that you need to agree with their POV or their outlook in life on everything. If you do, you would be fooling yourself and the other party involved.
9) Walk the walk – Instead of spending all your energy finding the perfect partner, work on yourself to be the best partner to someone. Start taking responsibility in this area of your life, and we are sure you will attract the right person.
10) Have Fun – The process can be emotionally exhausting for many, so ensure that you make it as fun as possible. Try new activities for dates and look at it as a way to meet amazing new people and possibly forge new friendships.